HOW TO DISCOVER YOUR CHILD

EVERY CHILD IS UNIQUE

The bible teaches us to train up our children in the way they should go. When we do that, they will not depart from it. Each child is unique and different from the other, hence the need to discover your child. Ignorance of the uniqueness of each child can make you involve in needless comparison. Deliberately avoid comparing your children or making a comparison between your child and others. In comparison many times, you tend to compare the weakness of one child with the strength of another child. The child doing poorly in math may be gifted in sports or music. One child can be easy going and phlegmatic and the other highly extroverted and different. Don’t compare your children to avoid sibling rivalry or suppressing the child's uniqueness. As a parent, endeavour to understand your child's uniqueness, accept it and promote it.

Paying attention to the uniqueness of each child can help you develop that child in the way he should go. Otherwise, you may find yourself trying to configure the child to be who he is not or set him on a path that is not his. This can be  frustrating both for you and the child as well. A child’s latent potentials will be better developed and expressed if he knows daddy and mummy are okay with his uniqueness.

HOW TO DISCOVER YOUR CHILD

OBSERVE YOUR CHILD

Endeavour to observe the ways of each child deliberately. Begin early to observe each child from their formative stage and strategize to develop the distinctive potentials you discover in them. Your children live in the same house with you and exhibit various characteristics. You know their abilities, habits, likes and dislikes, temperaments, friends, what they are easily attracted to and what puts them off. You must really not be watching as a parent not to know the dominant trait and attributes of your child. When you discover your child’s potentials, tailor his/her training(s) along the line of your discovery. Let the singer sing and be herself if that is what you found, don’t make a medical doctor of her. Your discovery will also influence your choice of toys, school and course of study, the topic of interest for discussion and a whole lot of other nitty-gritty.

PAY ATTENTION TO WHAT THEY SAY: Listen to your children when they talk especially when they are communicating very salient points about themselves or experiences. Hear the child out and give suitable feedback when necessary.

MEDITATION: Ponder on some of the important things your child says to you and don’t lose touch of them. You will need those words to make critical decisions at some point in the child’s life. In the bible, Mary the mother of Jesus kept some of his sayings in her heart. Jacob (Israel) did the same for Joseph when he talked about the dreams God showed him.

PRAY

You should spend time to pray for each child.  Ask God to reveal the child to you and give you wisdom necessary to raise the child. 

SPEND QUALITY TIME WITH YOUR CHILD 

 Create room for friendship with your child. Bond with them from when they are still very tender and have time to play and just talk with them. Ask them deliberate questions about their life goals such as what do you like to become. You will be amazed at their response. This should be done deliberately and regularly especially for parents with very busy schedules due to work and business demands. Create time for your child and be disciplined to use the time created for your child and not for other activities. When you spend time with your child, you build and develop friendship. You also encourage communication and a healthier relationship between you and your child. Don’t be too tough that your child cannot talk comfortably with you. Your child should be able to talk with you in a healthy and comfortable atmosphere even when you have different opinions.

Discovering your child is important and is your responsibility as a parent. Make good use of your findings to channel your child in the way he should go.

God bless you! Discover your child.

 

BORN FOR A PURPOSE

 

Your life purpose is the rationale for your existence. Once upon a time, you were born and nurtured from being  a baby into the stage of independence. By default, you can  live each day as it comes naturally by the way nature and nurture shaped your perception and experiences. However, a time comes when you should see yourself beyond existing to make a living or solely for survival. In this way, the summary of your life will not be that you were born, got an education or informal training, engaged in economic activities, gave birth and raised children after which you breathe your last at the time of demise. Certainly, you will necessarily engage in all these activities and much more, but are they the primary goal for your existence? It is your realization of purpose that will influence the way you go about your daily activities (including religious, economic, parenting, charity and volunteering services etc) to live purposefully.

HOW TO DISCOVER YOUR PURPOSE

Why was I born is a question only you can answer. Think about certain questions critically as you examine yourself. 

1. What problem does the solution lie within your skill and propensity? 
2. Which sphere(s) of humanity requires your contribution and service?
3. Who are the people you can influence or meet their needs?
4. How can you reach out to your niche?
5.  What is the extent to which you can reach out?
6. What is unique about you?
7. What are you doing or have a longing to do that is beyond survival and gives you satisfaction?

The answers to these questions lie within you because nobody can define you better than yourself. Meditate on these questions and answer them. You can take a step further to pray to God to show you an in-depth picture of your life’s purpose.

Some persons are born leaders, teachers, preachers, singers, inventors, teachers, writers, poets, missionaries and the list goes on. In the city I was born and bred, one man rose in the person of Archbishop Benson Idahosa and lived beyond earning a living. His influence pervaded the city and spread beyond its confines across the world. He discovered his purpose and lived an impactful life. Notable missionaries David Livingstone, Mary Slessor and in most recent time, Reinhard Bonnke as well as other notable missionaries whose mission were for humanity and not to exploit Africa exemplify purposeful living. Nelson Mandela and other notable leaders whose struggles and leadership were not for self aggrandizement awake the consciousness that leadership is influence and for the good of the majority. 

You were born for a purpose, not solely for survival. Whatever you are born for, live for and do not be counter-productive. 

Thank you for reading!

 

 Read more inspiring articles about purpose

LIVE PURPOSEFULLY  

A MAN OF PURPOSE 

PURPOSE AND SELFLESSNESS

 

 

SPOKEN WORKS ARE SEEDS: SPEAK PURPOSEFULLY

 

WORDS

Words are remarkable elements of communication, whether written or spoken out of the mouth. Our vocal cords give expression to the happenings in our mind and transmit the silent thoughts of our hearts into audible sounds. Little wonder, the bible admonishes "out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks".

The importance of spoken words cannot be under emphasized because they are a medium for communicating with one another and even to God in prayers. I am simply saying as a parent, you speak words to your children, you speak to your spouse, as a boss, you speak to your members of staff, a teacher speaks to her students and vice versa in all scenarios. You speak words in relating with God, to yourself, family and other members of society.

SPOKEN WORDS ARE SEEDS

Spoken words are seeds, they have the potential to grow and produce fruits when released. They do not only convey messages but also emotions as well. We express love, hate, anger, disgust, affirmation, gratitude etc with the words we speak. When you reflect, you can discover some words spoken to you even as a child that stayed with you for life. For some people, it was words that built them, for some others, it was negative words that marred them and they never forget the experience. Whatever you say whether to yourself or others can produce a result (fruit). When you say 'I love you' for example and you truly do, the fruit of your words is felt by the person you are speaking to. In the same vein, when you say I cannot do it, the fruit of inability is produced and you will lack the drive and energy or inspiration to do the needful.

The world was framed by the word of God. God spoke creation into being and He saw that what He created was good. The seed of the word of God produced the effect of creation into being. You can create with your words by speaking into being the things that be not as though they were.

HOW SHOULD YOU SPEAK

Endeavor to be purposeful with the words you speak. This is important because you shall have what you say. The people of Israel in the Bible spoke in a certain way and God said as they have spoken, he will do to them (see Numbers 14:28). Don’t speak words carelessly for the sake of speaking or giving a response. Don’t speak fear, doubt, failure, defeat, lack, condemnation, sickness death etc. For some people, it doesn’t matter to them the words they speak, they see spoken words as merely statements or sentence(s) for expression. The mere fact that you can't retract the words you spoke though you were joking or become sorry for the kind of words is enough recourse to be mindful of the way we speak.

SPEAK PURPOSEFULLY

The word of God is living and powerful, spirit and life as well too; so use it in your vocabulary. Speak the word of God especially if you know it. Be intentional with your words and speak positively. Speak life to whatever is dying around you. As a parent, speak blessings to your children and not curses. Speak life, speak health, and speak wealth.

You are likely not going to speak right if your make-up has not been conditioned to do so because out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks. This means your words convey the intents of your heart, expresses your personality. You speak what you have been fed with, what you have been giving attention to and dominant around you. If you want to speak right and purposefully, listen to the right things, think right, and believe the right things. Give attention to the word of God, it will renew your mind and make you conscious of it and from the abundance of the word of God in your heart, your mouth will speak.

WHAT DOES THE BIBLE TEACH ABOUT OUR SPEECH

Our words should be seasoned with salt and grace. They should edify, add value, heal, bless and not curse. Don’t be vulgar with words or speak deceitfully, stirring up strife and acrimony with your words. Be pleasant with words and shun sarcasm. You can decide to be silent when you don’t know what to say, instead of speaking folly or ignorantly. You should open your mouth with wisdom. It’s not about your grammatical expression, but your attitude and the aura your words carry. The next time you are tempted to speak provocatively, think of the import of your words and the resultant effect. Death and life are in the power of the tongue, if it will kill and not heal, please refrain from speaking.

 

God bless you!